Sofie's almost 5!!

Five always seems like a monumental birthday! Not sure why, but it just seems like a milestone....a marker of sorts. The "T" seems to drop from 5. It's no longer 2T, 3T and 4T, rather it's 5. The "toddler" part is removed, and a "little girl" is added.

No longer bite size pieces, rather counting. Trading in oversized board books for smaller print books, with real themes. Sentences are running together for conversations. Conversations that are engaging and thought provoking, which lead to big questions.

Sofia Margaret is turning FIVE! It seems to run together for me. Not sure when this happened, nor do I know how to slow it down. Can I stop to take a deep breath and soak in the moments longer before FIVE turns into FIFTEEN? Will I allow the Holy Spirit to remind me in the midst of school schedules, homework, cooking, cleaning, and just being present for three girls that I must remain in Him and abide in Him at this very hour to full live the life He's intended for me? The life He's fully intended for our Sofia Margaret? Lord, please help me do so.

Father, I pray a very special blessing over Sofie. It's 5:05 a.m. and she's resting soundly in her bed, as I scroll through photos and print my heart on this very page. She will not understand a mom's full love for her daughter until she becomes a mom one day, and on that day, grant her the same kind of love I feel for her this very moment. I love her so very much, and I am forever grateful to the young girl You've created her to be. Through this very life, I have learned to pray harder, listen more, become more aware, open my eyes to those around me, recognize baby carriers from a distance, nap harder, enjoy my home more, and so much more. Lord, may you keep her close to Your heart, and call her name out. When You call, may she hear your voice, and respond. Bless her endlessly and give her a deep confidence in You!! Teach us to breathe in the next five years deeply and slowly! Thank you for Sofia ("love of wisdom") Margaret ("pearl")!!

In Him...

Mochilas hanging. . .

Just a few more weeks until alarm clocks are waking us, homework demands our attention, students waiting for their assignments, friends are being reunited, teachers are working out the new names of their students, event calendars are handed out, bells are sounding, lunch bags are filled once again, and so much more. In just a few weeks, a new school year starts.





With so many things up in the air this past summer, we weren't sure if we were going to be here or there. I couldn't allow the normal anticipation of a new school year begin, because I wasn't even sure of what our home address would be. I'm thankful for answered prayers, even if it's a "no" for now. A "no", allows us to move. It allows us to move forward with anticipation, and it even refreshes our excitement for where we are right this very moment.





The beauty of a new school year at our Christian school is the size. I get to keep one set of students I had last year, as a new round comes. I get to hear stories from familiar names on my roll sheets, and work on memorizing faces with names for the new group. Each one so special....each one as unique as the group before them. I can hardly wait!





Every year, I gear up with new ideas, new ways of doing things, improvements to what worked last year, and scratching out things that didn't work. It's a time of growth, a time of evaluation and a moment of reflection.





Lord, thank you for our three precious students that will be gracing a new desk. Three girls for Him, waiting to let their light shine in a unique, individual way. Thank you for three girls that will impact their graduating classes in ways we cannot count. Seventh grade, second grade, and a Pre-K bridge class will not be the same this year, simply because these three girls are in attendance. I pray that you walk with them, lead them, give them hearts full of gratitude, joy and excitement for what You're going to teach them this year. History, English, Science, foreign language, even SST, have all been created by You. Let them find a wonder in their studies. What a gift!





Father, be with me, as I prepare for a new school year. Help me stay focused, patient, and steadfast. Allow me to find that special something in the faces of my students. Help me build upon the foundation that You have laid with their parents. Allow moments of growth to take place, and help us recognize you in our moments of VICTORY, and call upon You when feeling DEFEATED. Thank you for new beginnings in August.





With much love,





Beth

I always have two windows open when I blog. The obvious is this one, but I always open up http://www.aholyexperience.com/ and allow her blog to play. She has such wonderful, peaceful music playing while her readers drop by to see what inspiration she has poured out on her site. Is that odd, that I open her blog to type mine?

The writer of A Holy Experience, is the author of this book, and I'm enjoying it so. A friend of mine purchased it for me, and brought it over the night I had a group of ladies over for a summer dinner. I thought it was going to be a book about counting your blessings, a list of sorts, but it's not. It's about loss, numb feelings of salvation, and the slow turning of events leading to God's full grace and glory. And of course it leads to finding the "gifts". Now, don't ask me too much..........I've only finished 65 pages. But, I'll jot down some thoughts along the way.

Lord, please let see you in all that surrounds me. Not the obvious. Let me see the quiet, hidden places where you reside. Places that are skipped over on a daily basis. Places that only a young child could find. Help me see those places, smell them, and experience them. May I walk away, and proclaim You! And know You as the author and creator of every page of mine. All 12,165 days that I have witnessed a sunrise and sunset!

I love you Father! Thank You!

It stops here. . .

After several weeks of waiting, wondering and even dreaming, we received our answer. The answer is no. It doesn't mean that He wasn't where He needed us or that He wasted our time. It just means that He hasn't revealed His plan. The "no" is still apart of the plan.

Disappointment, a deep sigh, and a feeling of wonder is here, but it's fading quickly. Now, we know we are to stay right here.........looking at the same windows, watching the same cars pass by as they head home after a long day's work, and it's an opportunity. An opportunity to draw closer to family and friends and meet their needs. It means we serve a little harder and also be served. Intrastate phone calls instead of Interstate. A quick drive over instead of a flight. That's all. That's still wonderful!

So, I gear up. I pick up school supply lists. I begin my Spanish lesson plans for the my level 1 and 2 kids. I prepare us for a new school year. AND I still keep my eye open. He's doing His thing, and I want to be found faithful in the waiting.

Today's verse:

Isaiah 30:15

For the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, has said:
"You will be delivered by returning and resting; your strength will lie in quiet confidence..."

Lord, Let me return, rest, and lie in quiet confidence. What a wonderful place to be! Oh..........and help me clean my house today. So much to do........

I love you Lord!

A new kind of swim lesson. . .

No swim lessons for no reason. Not sure why I've waited this summer on giving the girls swim lessons....................UNTIL today!!!

Their big sister has to teach them. If I would've signed them up for lessons, and they were making their way around the pool like two Nemos, then what joy would Brie have in teaching her two little sisters how to trust her in the water. Now they're jumping in the water, with little fear, and true, they have a floatie around them, but it's more than Saturday. Small steps in trusting, both for their big sister in and them. It's worth the risk. One gets to be apart of a family, and then the others get to be free in the water.

Thank you Lord for delayed lessons, and for delivering them in the heat of the morning, in a neighborhood pool, wrapped in love.

Death has lost it's sting. . .

In the past four months, both Andres and I have attended a memorial service for our co-worker's son, both in their early 20's, both born to die, both living with the King.

Yesterday, it was my turn. I was so anxious to see the face of the strong woman that I've known his mother to be. She's no taller than I, but her mind is of extraordinary wisdom and knowledge. Not just book knowledge, but true, meaningful wisdom, given without apology. She's a strong, wonderful woman, and I wasn't sure if I was ready to see her at such a vulnerable state. Would she appear worn down from the two week wait to bury her son? Would she be shaking her fist at God, wondering why? Would she seem numb to her circumstances? Or would she lift her hands in praise that He is still in the moment?

As I turned on the car to make my way, I played the song "Finest Hour" by Matthew West. "This is my finest hour...." If what He says is true, then this is her finest hour. Through death, will come more life. Death has lost it's sting! Death no longer means the end to which we live life, rather the beginning of our eternity. I sang that song very loud for her. In my prayers, I placed her in the hands of her Heavenly Father and gripped my heart for what would come.

As I walked into the foyer of the church, I realized there was a line, leading up to the sweet, strong woman wearing yellow. Yellow? Yellow! To represent the "Son", to represent "joy", to represent the season in which her son's life was called for.

I gave her hug that lasted for a moment's time. I whispered to her that this is her finest hour, and she whispered to me that this is the end of times. "We are living the last days."

On the mountains of Sofia, Bulgaria, he took his last breath. He marveled at the Creator's creation, and fell asleep amongst the arms of trees, clouds, and white snow. He woke up standing before the Creator of such miraculous places and embraced his father, his Heavenly Father.

Father, may we enjoy the laughter of our children, or even the moments of frustration. May we see the mundane chores like filling up our car full of gas, as an opportunity to travel your distances. May we breathe deeply in the morning because you chose to give us another day to commune with our family and friends. May we rejoice over the grass we have to cut, for their is life in that grass or we wouldn't have to cut it. May your Spirit speak to us in every moment we live out.

I love you with all my heart, and I pray the day I take my last breath, more life would be given because of the testimony I live out. May my light shine for you beyond my physical presence. May the girls always assign their mom the color yellow. The color that represents the "Son", and the joy that comes in the morning! May my husband feel full from the life that we lived together. May he never look back and find empty pockets. Thank you for our beginnings!

Two Step. . . sort of . . .

There it was, a buzzing cell phone in my hand with the words "unavailable number". I hurried to the garage, where Andres was heating up the grill, and said, "Here...someone' calling. It might be...." And as soon as that, we found out that Andres made it to round two of interviews. He was being looked at, even closer, for the possible relocation to Arizona. Next step? A possible flight out for a face to face, but we will have to wait for another week or so for that.

Once again, my devotional for the day was so perfect. He doesn't want me to miss the moments.....squander away the day with foreshadowing thoughts. My Spirit reads the words of those pages as if it's a fresh pour of water on life's petals, but my mind gets muddied with the downpour of insecurity. What type of insecurity? The type that says, "How do we really know that this is Him?" even though He's made His mark in ways that I cannot count, just for thoughts like these. Confusion is not from Him, peace is. Confusion is what I feel when I give way to my thinking, but peace is when I think of what He may be doing!

Lord, I pray that I will close the lid to this laptop, take a deep sigh of breath, and feel squeezed as you send me off to bed. it's 11:20 p.m., and there is much to do tomorrow. Three flowers in my garden to tend to, and they all end with "ie". There's broccoli to chop for my Paula Dean broccoli salad, and fruit to scoop. There's prayer to walked through this home before ladies arrive at 7 p.m. with hearts full of emotions. You need me rested and able to enjoy what you have in store for our lives tomorrow. Good night fear, anxious thoughts!! I'm wrapping myself in a blanket of TRUST and REST!!! I love you Lord!

Still waiting...........one week to date since our first interview.

A few things along the way to remind us that He is apart of this process, whether the end result is a "yes" or "no".

Devotional for yesterday, after the night that Andres woke up with the burning question, "Can we really have a "life" in Arizona?" The kind of life where relationships are in abound, where our church home is a place of refuge and strength, where a phone call is never ceasing. That kind of life. Well, I thought, "I'm not sure," I answer. This was the first time we felt this type of question since the "revelation" on the way home from our friend's lake house.

So, early in the morning, before Andres grabbed his lunch to head out the door to see what awaits him, I read my devotional. I would have to look up the scripture later, but for now a good word to leave with would be nice.

"Whenever you start to feel anxious, remind yourself that your security rests in Me alone, and I am totally trustworthy. You will never be in control of your life circumstances, but you can relax and trust in My control. Instead of striving for a predictable, safe lifestyle, seek to know Me in greater depth. I long to make your life a glorious adventure, but you MUST stop clinging to old ways."

That started our day off right, and sliced right through the fear that we were having. What were we fearing? Afterall, aren't adventures of life supposed to be exciting and climatic? Depends......if I was going to hike down the Grand Canyon, and had waited for it all my life, it would be an adventure packed full of emotions. Excitement to finally be at "this moment", nervous of what the physical cost was going to be, and a rush of "it's finally here", which undoubtedly would lead to tears for me. Well, that's what we feel right now, and as each day passes, and we're not sure if it is a "yes" or "no", it delays those emotions for yet another day. At the same time, I can hear the Lord telling me to "STOP asking me if we're there yet!? Like mere children in the backseat of a planned out trip, you keep asking me if "we're there yet", and I have so much planned for you when we arrive. ENJOY the views outside your window, eat your snack, drink your coffee, and breathe deeply. We'll be there shortly."

And then, shortly after Andres left, I grabbed my Bible to look up the scripture to the devotional, and it was in Isaiah 43:18-19:

"Do not remember the past events, pay no attention to things of old. LOOK, I am about to do something NEW; even now it is coming. Do you not see it, Andres and Elizabeth? Indeed, I will make a way in the wilderness, rivers in the desert."

I have read this one before, in fact, it was underlined in a heavy, black ink in my Bible, but the "rivers in the desert part". That meant more to me now then ever before. I called Andres to share the scripture, and he shared that the Lord had taken him back to a part in our trip where we were hugged between two desert mountains, and at the bottom of the these two mountains were a HUGE over growth of vegetation. Papa Sunshine (Papa gave himself an Indian name so he could be an official guide) said that the rivers ran through these two mountains during the monsoon seasons, and it offered enough water to bring life.

So, at the time the Lord was bringing me the words from His Word, He was giving Andres a visual of life in the desert.

So, to answer my beloved's question, "Can we make a life in Arizona?", the answer is "YeS!" We can because He said that He will provide "rivers in the desert", and water brings life. So, as long as we continue to cling to Him and reach out to those around us when/if we move there, then life will abound no matter where we reside.

It's 4:47 p.m. and it's two hours behind in Phoenix, Arizona. I can't help but click "refresh" in my "in-box", but I'm going to try to sit back in my seat, listen to the music He is playing, roll down my window for fresh air, and just enjoy the journey He has us on. I don't want to miss the Texas summer heat, the flowers that are blooming inspite of their overworked roots, the girls watching Strawberry Shortcake, and the freedom to blog my thoughts. Sweet Jesus, how I do love You!!!!