Dearest Lord,
I am writing you as Andres and I are sitting in the ER at
Gila Hospital. Andres is super sick,
round two, with super high fevers and even a delusional state of mind. He was diagnosed today with the flu, but it
just continued to get worse as the night went on. The girls were scared and their biggest
concern was anything happening to their Daddy.
Katie’s heart broke and she just fell apart because the thought of something
being wrong with her Daddy, after losing her Papa was more than she could
handle. Brie texted me while I was here
and she just misses us being a family of five, more than anything else. I just glimpsed over at Andres and he looks
terrible. I have never seen him look
this way before, over the 18 ½ years that we’ve been together.
Lord, I don’t know what You are allowing come our way, but
it’s hard. We have lost full control of
our lives and it just feels like all ground has been removed underneath
us. I am supposed to start a job
tomorrow, the girls are going to be out this day or that day, Andres is super
ill, we are all grieving the loss of Dad, and the list seems to go on and
on. Maribel left on a plane yesterday
for El Salvador, as her mom is dying and though it’s expected, it’s just the
timing of it all. I want to draw my
strength from You, and You alone, but I don’t even have strength to draw
strength. It takes energy to do that
too.
Father, this very night, I ask that you be with my
family. Be close to us and see our every
move. Please give us a fresh breath of
air and let us refill with some hope and peace that only You can provide. This is my first letter to You, as I’ve
changed my letter writing from Dad, to You.
Be my all in all.
With love and a desperation for Your presence,
Beth
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